Guest post: C. writes about us
Yesterday I asked C. if he would like to write a guest post for my blog. The topic I suggested him was: Differences between dating a Chinese girl and a foreigner. I told him to think about it and, if he felt like writing something, I would publish it. 30 minutes later I had the following text in my inbox. I didn’t know he was so anxious to appear on my blog! The text is not exactly what I had in mind and answers my question just in part, but I thought it would make a nice guest post anyway. Ladies and gentlemen, this is C. speaking about a little bit of everything, mostly about our relationship. My comments are included in italics.
Someone told me before, “You should be close to those people who will give you positive energe, and stay away from those people who will give you negative influence.“
At that time, I met Marta, who pulled me out of the worst period of my life and gave me a complete different life style and what is most important, hope.
I don’t want to talk about the details on the mess I experienced at that time, you know, another story about a failed relationship.
I had nearly lost everything.
At that very desperate night, I was moving out from my old house. Marta found me, as a stranger through a popular social APP at that time. [Maybe I will write a post telling how we met!].
At that moment, that condition made me enter the mode of ‘POURING OUT THE STORY’. I could not wait to find someone who would listen to my sad story. But what I didn’t expect was that my sad story could get another sad story inexchange. And what’s more, I still can remember clearly even today, that sentence of ‘我们可以抱着一起哭’. [That is something I said. “Let’s hug and cry together” (over both our sad stories)]. But actually we didn’t. I became much happier than the past 30 years of my life. There is no reason to cry any more.
Let’s move to our happy life after the short recall of the sadness.
You know, I have a Spanish girlfriend now. I still remember mom used to make fun of me when I was a kid, ‘Hey, my pretty little boy, when you grow up please do not find me a foreign daughter-in-law , mom cannot speak English, we wouldn’t be able to communicate, hahaha’. [I didn’t know this!! She really told you that when you were a kid??].
Sorry mom, now I got you a Spanish daughter-in-law. But fortunately, she can speak Mandrin, and very well :)
After being together with Marta, I entered an entire different world. THE DEMOCRACY WORLD!! Sorry, just kidding.
But Marta really has influenced some part of my world outlook and values.
Growing up in this fast developing China, more and more Chinese people become so materialistic, it has nearly become the common sense of the Chinese society.
If you want to marry a Chinese girl, you as a boy should prepare at least a house and a car; the boyfriend should pay for everything when going out with a Chinese girl, even when she is not your girlfriend; happy life means a lot of money; and so on.
Frankly speaking, I was also stuck into these as a Chinese.
But Marta changed my point of view. She knows what is the real happy life, she prefers traveling to different countries rather than buying a CHANEL, she thinks we do not need to buy a house of our own(sorry but that is still one of my short-term aims), she prefers walking more than driving a car, she is so kind and so nice to every member of my family, she is always so kind and polite, and she loves music.
Before we got together, I spent most of my daily life working, playing video games, sleeping and such things to kill time. But now, we have been to several countries, we have different travel plans every year (Marta is good at planning such things, like a travel agent). I have seen different cultures and places I hadn’t paid attention to before. And we take online MOOC courses together. I have recaught the desire of learning new knowledge.
Posing in Cebu, Philippines.
If someone asks if there is a culture gap between us, the answer is of course there is. But fortunately, we both could get used to different cultures easily.
Life needs mutual understanding, right?