My boyfriend is still a child

Chinese men have this reputation of being mama’s boys, as a result of being completely spoiled while they grow up. While I can’t talk for all Chinese men, I can share my experiences living under the same roof with C. He is a single child and I’m not sure if he was treated like a little emperor when he was young, but what I can tell is that, if he was, he learned to care about himself after moving out of his parents’ home. He does the dishes, knows how to use a washing machine, irons his shirts and vacuums and mops the floor. He has never cleaned the toilet though, but that is ok as I can do that while he is busy with the floor. I hate mopping!

However, there are other things that suggest he might be a child trapped in the body of a 31 year old guy (32 by Chinese age counting standards). Let me elaborate:

1. He only knows inappropriate words in Spanish

I want him to learn Spanish, not only so he can communicate with my parents, but also in case we need to move to Spain in the future. I bought him several learning books and a Spanish grammar especially written for Mandarin native speakers. He also tried several learning apps. I don’t know what went wrong. Maybe it’s because I haven’t been a very dedicated teacher and I am not forcing him to study. The result is that most of the words he remembers are not suitable to say aloud in public as he would sound like a 3 year old who just learned to say poo, pee, boobs, ass, and things like that.


Did you just say “culo”? :D

2. I need to use tricks to keep him from wearing the same clothes 

During the week he needs to wear a suit so this doesn’t apply. The problem appears during the weekends. He will always choose the first t-shirt on the pile, so if I let him it would seem that he only has a t-shirt and wears it every weekend. So to avoid this I put the clean t-shirts on the bottom of the pile, under the ones that were previously on the drawer. This way he will still choose the first t-shirt on the pile, but it will be a different one every day. I win!!

3. He owns an insane quantity of Nerf guns

Nerf guns

The ones that shoot water and the ones that shoot rubber bullets. Large, medium and small size. We have them all.

4. If he discovers a new food that he likes, he wants to eat it all the time

Up until now we have had the “Tomas Pizza era”, in which he wanted to eat pizza and fried chicken from this small Korean restaurant in the neighbourhood all the time; the “green curry era”, in which we had to go to Thai restaurants and invariably order green curry, and the “salmon sashimi era”. The newest addition has been “Thai crispy seaweed snack era”: we have to eat it every night while we watch tv. I wonder what the next food craze will be!

5. He starts new hobbies and leaves them after one day

Once we were in a bookstore and he saw a drawing book. He bought the book, a very nice drawing notepad and a box of color pencils. He proceeded to tell me that he was going to learn to draw. Well, that was two years ago and until now he has used three pages of the notepad. Similar situations have happened with a bike, a ukelele, an oil painting canvas and video games that I never see him use. He says he uses them when I’m not home.


Life would be quite boring if we acted like reasonable adults all the time!